mom cooked! zomg.

FEAST, MOTHERFUCKERS!

will be to east coast park tomorrow, with my aunts and adik sedara(s) from morning to i don't know when. i'm looking forward to the new year, since i've already gotten my proper resolution and i'm ready to be up for new obstacles in my life. yippedee. but sadly, i'll be countdown-ing at home, and i think i'll be calling haikal tonight. to countdown with. that's hot, since we've countdown-ed together last year. wow! alright, i'm friggin' bored. and shinx wants to use the pc. happy new year, naaaaa.

i look like one drunken bitch. with ugly eyebags. omg.

this is me, uneditted. (:

Am I wasting all my time
Fighting through this so-called life
Can you tell me now
How do we know just when the fight should end
When I can take the broken, bent,
And shattered hopes and walk away
From this place...

Do you miss me since I stood and walked away
To find the reasons why I'm living every day
For that something that I can't seem to find this time
But I will be all that I set myself up here to be
And I will try to see the future through your eyes and keep
Myself fine away from all the ones who punish me for
All the little reasons every vision I will keep, but...

BANNER YEARS - GAVIN MIKHAIL.
if you love jack's mannequin, this guy's not that bad too.

different people and different perspectives.
woooo. i was visiting blogs, and i think jamilah's post really speaks out.

"so, i was reading some articles about saddam hussein.
i mean, i fully respect him.
he takes his sentence to death calm and strong.
though he may be cruel towards his country, but as a muslim, i feel that at a certain point, its not fair. its not fair for saddam hussein to be treated like this. but oh well, its already done and saddam hussein will be a legend and history."

before that, i had a short debate with een about the same topic.
he was setting his points about w. bush. i wasn't taking any sides, but he seemed to think otherwise. he said that bush should be hung instead. in ways, bush is right. he does have harsh decisions but when i heard over the radio, about the country going on democracy, that just got me thinking. saddam wasn't much of a good leader for his own country, since his actions were against his own men and caused international unfortunate events. tsk. and and, een. if there was no w.bush, no one as smart as him would lead the america. remember, global warming, and his country's industry. that's all i think about. polar bears and melting icecaps (: honestly, een, you're not smart enough to lead a country. haha. well, saddam is saddam. and i respect his death. he was trying his best for his country, unfortunately other people thought otherwise. maybe his death will bring his country a better presidency, and a more democratic and more civilised country. hope for the best. especially for his people. (:

like, excuse me for trying to act political.

pathetic right? it's like, really, really, really oh my gawd.

i miss the guy who bought me roses. where are you wi.
you promised me to be reached. you did!

alright, the "don't call me baby" song keeps ringing in my head. no matter how irritating it is, i just cannot shut it off. don't call me baby.. you know i'll never belong to you.. ahaaaaaaaaaa. ey, asrul nak jadi uztaz emo. how superficial. haha. then he, assalamualaikum me. that's cute. zomg. and his "asal diam ey". chatting with syafiq and alfa. my classmate na! and cicakman, na! so, hari raya haji! bekk, bekk. oops, i got to run.

went shopping with my dad.

eurgh. promised to buy bags, but he said only buy those cheap-cheap ones below 40$, or not, talk to the hand. what a bitchfit attitude. when i came back, complained to my mom, she said. "sekarang baru kau rasa bapak kau punya kedekkks". what an ass. so, went to bugis juntion, saw this white leather bagpack for 35$ at edge, and he said it was too white. so walked, and walked. he shouted at me, saying everything was expensive. like what the faaark! (usually he's not this kemot with me tau) but then, he bought himself a pair of giordano cargo pants (50% of 46$), his underwear (16+$) , his socks (11$) and even kaya! he bought bread talk kaya then ya kun kaya because it was cheap. kimak. sial lan punya bapak. tanam duit dengan family, sekarang. so, i'm friggin' pissed to the core, like oh my gawd. because i still haven't gotten myself a bagpack. but i'm eye-ing on this bagpack which costs 46+ at 77th Street. oh dad, you're born a bastard. but, he's kind enough to be buying me famous amos butterscotch pecan cookies and i bought shinx macamadian whatever shitfuck. (:

and note to self, even if i'm in a happy mood, never chat with hadziq.
and please, never expire to the term, "wanker" and "minah". bastard.

oh aaaaaaah. mom's cooking bonestick for hari raya haji! yaay! and please stop asking me about any friggin' countdowns, since i'll be stuck at home because it's hari raya haji. so back off stupid bastards. DON'T ASK ME ABOUT ANY FRIGGIN' COUNTDOWN.

MESSAGE: u...* confidential * im so bored..im sori byk2 k syg... pls im sori im sori im sori im sori im sori....... sori k MUACKZZZ!!!!

he sent me this while i was on vacation.. &now, i'm on the phone with him. sayangs' talking about burger ramly. aaaaaaaah! he's saying his "yooooooooooouu.. ." lmao. that's cute. uber cute. he was playing his psp just now, so called "driving his lamborghini." i got bored calling "sayang, sayang" so i stopped by lambocars.com! and here's some pictures, and i shared the url with suhaily. harhaaaaaaaaaar.

old-school maaaaa.

lambo murchielago versace - black.

lambo murchielago roadster/ versace (either one)

IMAGES ARE ALL BASED ON.. . .. . MUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ((:
roadtrip to kl : 26th Dec - 29th Dec. love the vacation, daddy! xoxoxo.


baaack and i've received multiple text messages.. . from nana, syafiq and etc.
whooots. i am missed by so many people. ((: tak sangka orang begitu sayang pada aku, maaaah! so, first day, dad was exhausted and we rested at sofitel. then continued on a 4 hour car-ride to kl. we booked in at swiss inn. there were many mat salleys. they all smiled at me, aww shucks. hahahaha. so on the day we booked in, we went to p.s (you guess where) and shopped. i bought myself a pair of double-tongued Converse sneakers. sadly, a size-4. but it's okay maaah. okay, skipped what i shopped and just tell what i bought. okay maaah?

bought : a pair of Converse double-tongued(blue) sneakers, 2 dresses, 1 blouse, a pair of black pants, baju for Hari Raya Haji, sockkks :D, jewellery from masjid india, mascara(to be shared with shinx!) and tadaaaah. dad promised schoolbag at bugis!

mat malaysias at kl were pesky and irritating. you know, they winked at me. they were like, *wewiits* and then got this mat rempit, you know the look scabby men do when they see women. when they use their tongue to wipe their lips, yang so called sexy laar kirakan. can you believe one guy actually did that to me! disgusting fagg! then got this guy, want to berniaga, waved his hand right over my face! then got this one guy, selling nasi lemak, and he walked past me and said "hi". ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! butttttttttttttt, overall i'm satisfied with the vacation. well, hahahaha. saving my last thoughts until the end of my blog.

I LOVE ASRUL OHSOVAAAARYMOOOCH! ((: he said he missed me. alalaaaaarrrs! he told me he was stabbed at the back.. . and then he vommitted laaar. like zomg. now he told me he's hungry. awwhhhhhhhhhssss! and he said he wanted to meet me. super flawwed. zomg this is superlove. ooh aaaaaaaah ooh aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE ASRUL! hahahaha. he told me he stored my picture inside his phone. and his mother said i was cuute. ((: this one, right? ((:

shoes ((: malas nak amik lawa-lawa. size-four maaaaaa! biggie. zomg, i miss cicakman and the cicaksquad! and that gay extremist yang tanak mengaku diri. woooohhh. okay, since vacation i haven't barry'd. so i'm going to defacate(spelling mistake, i know!) rigggggght now.

away to malaysia tommorrow, despite the flood.
tuesday to friday/saturday/ or even sunday.

i am seriously going to miss asrul.
very very mooochs. hais, i'm affirmative he'll be having fun when i'm not around. but it's okay. so, i got his picture, uploaded inside my v3x. my roadtrip will never be the same, without him. ay ay ay ay. i cannot forget his, "yooouuuuu... . asal diam ey?" and his "abey you diamm.. ." oh my sayangsayang. do you know that i'll be gone, tommorrow? :/

I long, long to find a cure for the feeling.

I find in these chords.

I smile as it burns.

i kind of love you. i kind of do.

call me tonight, before i'm off.

ZOMG IT HURTS TO LOVE YOU.

but i'm willing to do anything.

((((: hug my pillows and smell my bantal busuk.

suffocate tonight, dee. let me reek.

today, is my blog's 200th post.
:D

i've put up multiple posts before this one, in just a day. excuse me, i was being mad. christmas christmas and i'm sitting at home. whoooooots. chatting with pakteh and bushhhhhhhh, cicakman. &myspacing with nini and didi. and now, confirmed, will be to malaysia on holidays, tomorrow, until friday-saturday-sunday. i'll be missing sayangsayang ohsovery much! you know he texted me at around 8AM. like zomg, i locked the text message siaaah. it read, "hello syg da bagun ke blom? klau da bagun call me k syg... morning muackzzz!!!" i was awake, but i continued to sleep after that. shuccccks. and he called me just now. he was like, "now i know you really.. ."

so before i went to bed, fariz texted me.
on the day itself, he was out with his friends, and he told me he was going to meet santa claus. i told him to tell santa to bring me present. a boyfriend. wah chey, dee tataw malu. and then at 4AM, he texted me saying that santa told him that he'll make my wish come true. aaaah. :D see laa, i don't know why i'm actually being an ass on my own blog. being an over enthusiast-and somesort food poisoned(i ate spoiled nasi briyani!) okay. i want to stop here. i am seriously upset with the spoiled nasi briyani and my dad is "bweeeeeeeeekkkkkkkk"-ing at me like somesort of deathwill. -.-

FUCK THE MISBEGOTTEN(means bastard) SANTA CLAUS.

i see no boyfriends coming from little cute wrapping paper.
but i see handful little gifts he had left for me in my sock.
i'm so happy that i forget it was christmas. and yeah.
to all friends who sent me 'em christmas wishes.
go fuck 'em!

whoooho. i finally realised that i have boy-friends.
and i'm lucky. i cannot count them laa, would be kind of rude.
:D but i'd say whoooooooho. i soo cannot belive it.
one by one all my boy-friends texted me. friggin' cheap messages siaah.
lovelovelovelove.

PS: asrul is again, being an ass.
baru cakap "wtf" dah nak perah the word "fuck"
macam laaa aku maki dia gituuuuu.
i miss my sayangsayang seyyy!

my favourite songs, don't cheer me up.
but they bring me a sense of deep vertigo.
and, my bestfriends (one of them) is being an ass.
&&, i'm still trying my best to forget asrul.

my friends, i would like to thank faisal (hani's exboyfriend) with smittens of love. with one text message, ending with the words, "SMILE, cos i care." aku sanggop reply taw walaupon ppd low! asking me about tomorrow. and haaaaaah. it's rather annoying that he can make me smile, that maaaaany. *bigwidegrin* and he has this so called feeling called, I-WANT-TO-MEET-DEE. lemaofao! and then, again. hilmi was also there to cheer me on. this is an example of being a friend, to be there for him/ her. and not hesistant to care.

asrul is online.. but he's not chatting with me.
i don't quite care luhh. as much as he really is hurting me, i'll just keep loving myself.. i belong to me. zomg! that's one irritating song! eew. OKAYSHAKEITANDMOVEALONG. and right now, i'm chatting with hilmi. cuutes! so, just now, i lied on my back. staring at the walls, and listened to the songs i used to like.. .it didn't bring me happy thoughts but momentums which were sour. i guess i am really really missing mamat. and i miss him, big time. tengok ah, diyana sendiri trippin'. i miss his teeth, i miss the little glinch in his eyes when i know he's mad at me. i miss his immature jokes. and i miss him holding my hand, even when i push it aside. but truth is, i got to move on. but i never meant it to be this way. since the breakup until now, never had he texted me to ask about anything. asrul is being an ass. he's saying that i don't want to talk to him, but the matter of fact is. he's either busy on the phone with some other girl orrrrrrrrrrrr he just wants my attention. i cannot argue with him, because it's always he that wins and i end up crying till i sleep. pointless arguments with him always happen, but what does he care rigggggght. he doesn't even have the initiative to call me, but hehhs. like i said, what does he care -.-

you know, it really really hurts..
that you force yourself to trust somebody, even though you have insecurities about it. and you just got to trust him, up to your down-right disbelieves. &&it's so sad, that i've never lied about anything towards him. :/ it really really shuns. apart from being jealous, etc. i fuckcare about anything else in the world. sometimes i feel that i should keep this love for myself. why should i love somebody who doesn't love back, right? pointless discovery, dee. *claps*

i accept truth and the fanciful language i get from everybody. but i cannot continue being like this. i am not a slut, so i'm standing up for myself. i want somebody who wants me(dee). and if you love somebody, why do you have intentions to hurt him/her. i'd rather lose my dimple then being accepted for just a pretty face(though i'm not really saying i have one)

i refuse to expand my inner thoughts using negative forms in my blog.
and now nothing in this world mattered. except for hilmi. unlike those words which describes as a "bestfriend", "true friend" and etc. hilmi was really there for me. hilmi, not hilmy. and i am not ashamed of expressing the thoughts i have to him. thanks, friend.

excuse myself for being a depressant. i am displeased with everything that is swinging around my thoughts. i follow the weather like the rain that pours over the green grass. a sense of being fresh, like starting on something new. i really, really want that now. because it really really hurts to like asrul. would somebody else here, stand up and care. take my hand, and promise me you'd be there?

GET THE PICTURE /? :D

shinx is the saviour of the day.

she got her own computer admin.
so i logged in, using her account. and the password is, secret yaaaaw.
lovelovelove.

chatting with farhiie (gay extremist yang tanak mengaku diri) while waiting for asrul to get back from being missing in action. && to bloghopper from my tagboard. i appreciate you tagging and all those. but pleeaaaaaaaase! hahahaha. asrul bukan pacar gw. take note everybody. not my boyfriend.. . ((((: so right, just now.. . went to cik tini's house. sat there like one big ass person. slouching myself onto the couch, eating karipaps and watching mtv's video music awards. my aunt really really commented alot on shakira's body and her dancing. hahaha. then my mum tagged in. i was like, mesti laa, dia jaga perut. then they look at me. but it's so true. her bod's much nicer then ciara's. how i wish to obtain that fuuuuuuuuushh body.

so right, when came back. no pc to play, watched the news.
lucky that many european countries are taking actions against models. they banned models who were under sixteen of age, and they banned models who were too skinny. && to differenciate that is, they calculate the body mass index. aww. shuccccks. i respect the europeans, 100% tops. okay, bored. :D and, finally know that billy talent, is punk! lmao. first i thought it was somekind of rock, but then punk. nice you know. okay, stomach ache. just finished smoking just now. haaahs. nak berak. ooh, btw. hope you enjoy the youtube vid. i admit to the sucky harry potter short clicks laa, but then. it's the song, not the movie i was referring to.. "i won't be home for christmas, blink 182"

you know, my dad is being a whole bloody ass of one bastard.

he installed a password onto the administrator. and the both us can hardly break the code. he said, we are only allowed to the use the computer before 11. like what the fuck. and then, he said i have to hang up on phone calls before 12, or else he'll confiscate my phone. like wtf. he's suddenly so crucial around me, but a little less lenient with shinx. i'm always to be blamed and shut-up'ed for. geez, father. i'm currently listening to alesana - congratulations i hate you. the song fan told me to listen to. haaaahs. i don't much like the screamo part. macam geli sey telinga dengar.

hahaha. so like, last night. after asrul ate, he called me. told me he was sleepy, then he said he wants to sleep. so wished him goodnight and he had his rest. whoots. i'm listening to billy talent - red flag. hahahaha. cute song siaaah. :D alright, so there's this skater who added me on myspace. budak tsa. as much as i hate the place where they crash, i think he's awholesomehotstuff. haha. so now i'm listening to alternative/screamo/ hardcore music on whoever's online rbc. good choice of songs. hahaha. i think screamo is nice, but not too much of the scream-o. :D aaaaaaaahhhhhhh. eh billy talent is nice yaaaaw.

Dear Santa,

My name is Diyana and this year.. for Christmas, i want a jollybollywollyholly good present. I'd fuck care if you exist or not. But pretty please, i'm sure i've been behaving well this year. For Christmas, all i want is a boyfriend. :D One which is good in character, bad boy during over-control and definitely cute. Considered virgin-boy(must be affirmative) but experienced in many waays. :D Must not necassarily be rich, but if can, make possible. Look forward to a pleasant gift. Whoever that's cute and considered hot and buff may apply. &LOVELOVE!

WHOOOTS! CAN I LOVE ASRUL NOWWWWWW?
pretty pretty please. so, he called me just now. i was trying to catch fourty winks until i arose when shinx picked up my phone call. eurrrgh. i hate it when she does that. so took the phone before she hung up on thaaat phone call. and talked to sayangsayang for more than an hour, until he got hungry. hwaaaaahs. he made me imagine my bantal was him. and the hug and the kiss. whoots. :D so right now, he's probably feasting, and i'm chatting with alif, een, and the bastard, suzaimi. hahahaha. and myspacing with norman too. what fun! waiting for asrul to get baaack. aaaaaaaaah. so many friggin' houselizards at my house caaaaaan. and wahrao, my maid just dashed from her room to the toilet. why ey? why ey?

whooooots.

went to town. with the lemaofao guy. hahahaha.
i saw fatin at the bus-stop but i didn't tegur her. haha. don't know why. XD at town, ate at long john and he belanja'd the chocolate ice-cream thingy. it's nice yaaaaaaaaw.

after that, walked around. then took a train, to city hall.
alfa beli rokok boleh lepas. best, best. haaaaaaaahs. then we sat by the bay, listening to acoustic songs, or should say, was being emo. hahahaha. took off at around 7PM. he volunteered to have a piggyback. yaaaaaaaw. okay, i really totally love my punx08 shirt. i thank shinx alot that we matao'd for the tee. whooooots! :D okay, random pics.


shoes. my chuckys! (sizeone) and bigfoot.

i love shinx for this tee. haha. gambar pat dapur. XD
(this is how short i wanted to cut for, sarah)

so right, while was sitting by the bay.. . nana texted me. haha. she don't know how to do a tie, so she texted me. asked me to teach her. :D i told her i will, besides all damaians should be taught whaaaat. haha. then she say 3rd january meet her before enter school. haha. ajak nini sekali yaaw. i live right beside the school, so meet dulu tauu. haha, she also texted me about the school cullottes (skirt/shorts) haha. tssk! alright, chatting with sexyman pak teh and gay extremist(yang tanak mengaku diri) haha. bye bye faggots. thanks for reading.

i want to promise.

to never never try to hassle with asrul.
never ever! especially at 4AM, like just now.. .
asrul, don't leave me spaced! okay? okay?

:D haha. so "awal" he called me at 10AM just now.
i thought who laar, private number. then background dia lagu "in fear and faith", that's got to be asrul yaaaw. so we talked, heee. touchings siaa. then he and his cara-cara pondan.. "yooooouuu.. ." cute, cute. and then sambungkan sentence, "asal diam ey." haha. :D after we hung up after our long conversation, i continued to sleep. my adik sedara called, asked me out. alaar, i go out with her almost every month.. . usually to the library, and arcade (biasa laa. only 9 siaa.) then just now she ajak me go swimming. ahaha. luckily dad didn't allow me to go out. thanks thanks. i don't want to go swimming. :D

basirah from myspace told me the effective-ness of working out before you go to bed. since i've stopped doing situps for five days already. i'm try to force myself to get back to shape. :D besides, i've made a bet with Hilmy yaaw. i soo want a body like Aish. hurhur. most definitely! :] i am currently photoshopping brushes and fonts. whooots. and chatting with the cicaksquad. &lipasboy is being an ass. :] so i want to stop here. and resume shopping. :D

WHY CAN'T I LOVE?

it's ard 3:38AM.

chatting with asrul. &&fred.
:] dad finally discovered "Bluetooth places".
so i dug everything out from my V3X.

a quick edit. 5 minutes tops. "soft blur effect" i learnt from crash.century.





chucks! size 1, yaaaw.



i drew 'em. dates set back on 16 Dec (night of anni)


"abstract" and prove of a robot's penis!

so over pre-breakup. just waiting for the official breakup.

post-breakup is just. sitting back.. relaxing myself. no boyfriends.

just boy-friends. with asrul(smile yaaaw) and alfa. i admit that i'll be missing mamat for the moment. three months, yaaw. but, i'm gonna remember you, you gonna remember me. :D

alright, last pic. and god, save my day!

PENDING FOR BEN AND JERRRRRY'S YAAAAW.

new blogskin.
:] asrul is more more love.
listening to circa survive songs, the ones he sent me.
aku sudah terletak banget sama lagu-lagu nya.

chatting with sarah dee darling. yaaw. haha. friggin' love her yaaw. going out with her soon (been missing that!) i want to buy the killers black tee. alright, sarah? anyway, pending for ben and jerry's icecream that alfa promised. : D oh wee. asrul, don't get mad okay. i dari dulu suruh dia belanja. takmo jealous pasal alfa, yaaaw! was myspacing, then the Fariz guy sent me a message. hoho. he's only fourteen, and so punkrock! pink-dipped hair, blonde, and black. and then, he lives at yishun. ooh, and speaking of yishun, aish texted me. said he was sorry. hilmy read all those text messages. which was like an ass laa. it's so rude to be reading other people's private text messages. whoots. and okay, last point for a post. breaking up with mamat. confirmed. :/ three months wasted, and i'm sorry. but i just cannot continue. i already feel so bad having boy-friends, and then you banyak sabar. i don't want to hurt you, anymore. huggs!

I never wanted a partner and I never loved you,
Now you are free to leave.
This heart is already frozen,
I can't remember to fall.
And if I last through the winter,
I swear to you now, I won't call.

Congratulations, go home now.

on the phone with asrul.

draaats/
i keep on crying.
:] now we're okay yo.

again, i cannot resist the matrep picture.
whooots. re-making of a blogskin.
it's 1.10AM!

PRE/POST - BREAKUP YAWW. :/ with mamat.

oh i don't care, i don't care.

About Me

Name: 24juiceboxx

Location: Bedok Reservoir., East, Singapore

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